Original Thesis: In
this speech Longoria aims to convince the audience that President Obama
understands the needs of the American people and is going to work to build an
America were people’s dreams will be possible.
I plan to revise my thesis because it could use a little work ! My thesis should answer the question of my essay. For example, if the question was: Why is Eva Longoria a good credible person to promote President Obama? My thesis should answer this question.
I think you have the right idea for revising your thesis statement. Maybe you should think about the question of how Longoria tries to convince the audience President Obama understands the needs of the American people. I think your thesis is a pretty solid start but, it does need to be a little more specific. You could include the devices and strategies Longoria uses to convey the message. A thesis statement should be a specific overview of your entire essay. Like I said I think you are on the right track and once you answer those questions it will be an awesome thesis statement.
ReplyDeleteThis seems like a good way to revise your statement, I'd like to see what you do with it.
ReplyDelete